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18 November 2008
Tuesday, 1:30 PM

What a year this turned out to be.

Shortly after the year began, my time with the amazing team at Happy Cog ended. It was the best thing for all concerned, even if my lack of an exit strategy left me without direction. My comfort zone was toxic, so really, any direction would do.

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Fall Travels

17 September 2008
Wednesday, 12:59 AM

Thanks in large part to Rob Across America, this has been the most traveled year of my life, but it’s not over yet. Before I disappear under a pile of blankets for the winter, I have a few more North American destinations lined up for the fall. If you happen to see me in any of these places, I hope you’ll say hello.

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2008 US Air Guitar Championships

13 August 2008
Wednesday, 1:32 PM

Sometimes, you just can’t fight the urge to have your hair shaved into lightning bolts, hop a plane to San Francisco, and stand glaring in chaps on a stage in front of 1,500 drunken lunatics. I did this at the behest of my alter-ego Windhammer and the 2008 Cuervo Black US Air Guitar National Finals last Friday while the rest of the world had decidedly less fun watching the Olympic opening ceremonies.

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Something in the Air

09 June 2008
Monday, 8:13 AM

I like adjectives that are both crystal clear and totally vague. For example, you may be coming off a “good” weekend just like I am, but it’s entirely possible that the “good” elements of our respective weekends were completely different. Perhaps you were served an amazing slice of peach cobbler, or your blind date turned out to be George Clooney, or you finally disposed of some incriminating evidence that’s been haunting you for years. But you definitely weren’t crowned the Philadelphia regional champ of the US Air Guitar Championships. Nope, that was all me.

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Rob Across America

01 May 2008
Thursday, 2:08 PM

Okay, I have to make this really quick, because I’m already leaving much later than I wanted to. Leaving for what, you ask? A month-long, cross-country road trip, naturally. I made a web site for it which is where I’ll be writing exclusively for the next month (not that you expected to see anything new here). My bitchin’ Corolla is leaving Philadelphia momentarily—jump in the passenger seat!

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Ask The Monkey

03 July 2005

Dear The Monkey,

I think I swallowed a moth in my sleep. There was an antenna and/or leg on my lip when I looked in the mirror this morning. Should I be concerned? I sleep with my mouth wide open at night and it has gotten me thinking about just how much wildlife has met its demise while I slumber. I am not “creeped out” by the idea, but I do feel some remorse. Any advice/penance?


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Daily Haiku

03 January 2008

PhD thesis
steeped in baffling arcana
and fudge recipes

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02 January 2008

a comfy sofa
couldn’t sate his faineance
but sleeping pills could

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01 January 2008

The War on Terror
is more than merely zeitgeist
it’s a board game, too

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01 October 2007

many a person’s
life-changing bouleversement
was caused by Six Flags

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28 September 2007

I’m not mendacious
women dig my honesty
and my flying car

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On the Web

  • 2008 Spooky Sock Monkeys: Kim Cornell’s annual crop of petrifying primates is already almost sold out!
  • Dear Lulu: A downloadable book of print samples you can use to test the capabilities of print-on-demand services. Such a great idea.
  • Beard Revue: My beard has been rated 9.5/10.
  • Camp Naked Terror 7: Photos from this year’s Summer Camp Slasher Birthday Bash.
  • Touring to Alaska on Vegetable Oil!: My friend Matt and his tour mate Kyle demonstrate how they the prep the environmentally-friendly fuel that’s taking them across North America.

In the Stereo

On the Silver Screen

In Print

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